Reclaiming the divine feminine.
The summer of 2018
Reclaiming the divine feminine
OMG! We talk about reclaiming the divine feminine left and right.
And for so many centuries now, the divine feminine has been suppressed, has been crucified, prostituted, shamed, vandalized, scandalized and brutalized. Why would anyone do that?...and for what reason?
We talk about the patriarch silencing the feminine. We talk about all the ways and the different reasons and the devastating cost it has now had on humanity itself. The devastating effect it has had on our mother planet earth. We look at our planet and we say to ourslves...”we have killed the feminine. We have raped her, and raped her over and over again”. And now as a woman in todays world, at this pivotal point in history, I am feeling the evolutionary impulse, the movement of our times to stand up and reclaim the divine feminine!
But wait! Are you out of your mind?!...reclaiming the feminine you say? OMG!!! I don’t even know what that is! What IT is?! I have read about it from other individuals. What people thought IT was. What people remembered IT to be. What people think IT still is.
Have you any idea what it’s like to be a woman that is called today? Called to her life! Called to come back home, to her heart, back to her divine wild current. We are looking at this pivotal moment of this corse correction in our evolutionary process, in our history of human kind. We are again called to change direction and this time it is so much more visceral, so much more darker and profound because we are so lost, so very lost.
Today as a woman feeling into this movement, this restlessness, this pressure, this discontent that is born out of rage, a rage that is wilder than a wild fire, a rage that is swirling like the biggest tornado, a rage that has the momentum of a tsunami. It is a catastrophe waiting to be embraced. It is destruction in it’s most creative force, waiting to become.
What does that mean?
It means that it is going to break us asunder. Reclaim the divine feminine...you say!
As a woman today, I am invited to reclaim my divine feminine in front of the most heartless and unconscious forces ever. The sophisticated manipulation going around today when looking and poking at the divine feminine without having any idea of who they (we) are messing with!!! She is the wildest...not in the way that you think, like an animal running in the wilderness scratching, roaring and biting. Yawning, licking and rolling, purring and slaying. NO! Not that! That is just a kitty cat. When referring to the divine feminine we have just now started to look her in the eyes. Only to very swiftly turn our eyes away after being stung by her burn. How long can you look her in the eyes before you feel the burn?
As a woman today, standing and looking in the mirror seeing what we have manufactured, what we have cultivated and domesticated as the feminine, I feel an overwhelming need to stand up and reclaim my own sovereignty. I have bought into the destructive illusion of the feminine. I have volunteered consciously and unconsciously. Because in my soul and in my bones, there is something unfamiliar and incomprehensible, brewing. And it doesn’t look like, feel like, smell like, taste like, sound like anything I have experienced out there representing the divine feminine in here. How can I reclaim something that feels so foreign, so uninvited, so misunderstood and devastatingly beautiful with such chaotic powers.
I don’t know that reclaiming the divine feminine is safe for my person? I don’t know if reclaiming the divine feminine is safe for my womanhood? The womanhood that I have stood in for so long. The divine feminine will eat my womanhood alive! She will take and rip the structure, the very fabric of which I stand on. She will rip it apart. She will not listen to the conversation that is present today. She will not hear of it! She dances to a completely different drum. The drum of the universe pulsing in our veins. The drum of the universe pulsing in our lands. In mother earth, her majestic body. Is this the pulse that is echoing through our scarred psyche and our wildest dreams? Is this the pulse that elevates our heart beat when our bodies come into the state of ecstasy? We are just barely looking her in the eyes and only for a brief moment to feel the burn. We are pulled to her from deep within, from yearning to connect to something greater than our little selves. But when standing between love and fear we quickly let go because the unknown is unbearable. How am I suppose to reclaim something that the world has yet not fathomed.
You want me to stand up?... Woman by woman, we are called to our knees in our deepest darkness. woman by woman, We are called to our inner depths so that we can pull out the light of the divine feminine and you know what?... it is only in the most darkest of crevices of the human experience where the light of the divine feminine is born, where we say YES! Where we say YES to her, to life and everything that she is in the manifestation as us! Then when the invitation has been met, when we have surrendered completely and totally to all that we are, to all that we ever thought that we would be, to all that we ever knew, learned or heard, when we throw out our beliefs, our conditionings and let go of the conversations of the mental dance and we sink into the soil of our fragmented being, of our perturbed existence, of our destabilized stability, when we let go of our illusionary attachment to safety, when we let go of what we think we know as truth...then only then can we possibly, possibly, look her in the eyes without the burn and at that point we have nothing else and no one else to look at but her. It is not that we are reclaiming HER. It is that SHE is reclaiming US! She is asking US to let her back in. She is asking US to come in closer for the kiss. The kiss of death as you know life to be. Oh, but you do let her kiss you, in the most passionate, the most devastating, luxurious, piercing, burning, outrageous kiss you will have ever received... ahhhOhhhmmmhhh!.
I don’t know? I don’t know! Are we ready?! Are we ready for that kiss?! Are we ready as women to let the true divine feminine come in for the kiss? You have to be ready because your knees will buckle, your spine will twist, your tummy will ignite with fire, your chest will heave, your nipples will erect, your hair will stand on end, your skin will crawl while your roar will move mountains like an earthquake bellowing underneath. You will for certain feel the presence of her splendor and then....
Why do I speak this way?
Why do I think I know this?
I know nothing. She has just whispered to me ‘come closer”. She has whispered to me and these are my thoughts as I am pulled towards her. As I feel her I can feel her in my breath and I can feel her breath within me. She is asking me to part my lips so that she may enter, so that she may press her lips upon my life. I know once that happens, once I succumb to her kiss, it is over!
It is all over!
I am dead!
Dead to the woman that I was and awaken to something completely unfathomable. This is what I am most deadliest afraid of. As an awakening woman today I am starting to sense why the patriarch has been in terror for so many centuries. Why they have systematically and demographically suppressed and erased our voices. This voice of the divine feminine that we have allowed to be silenced, because we too, were afraid to hold such power. We too, were in on it. We allowed the patriarch to become our reason for abandoning our own truths and stepping away from our own love. We allowed the patriarch to assume dominance over us and our lands (bodies) because deep down we knew that the divine feminine was more powerful than we could ever be held accountable for. That we could own as our truth and stand up for.The terror that ripples through us at moments of deep destruction and pain. At moments of unimaginable creativity, life growing inside us and sacrifice, life birthing from us.. We knew that only the most powerful light would allow such horror to come upon us. We knew that only this kind of power, this fierce power, would allow such atrocities to be played out upon her own body. It was a necessary movement through contrasts in order to create new dreams and new realities. She accepted the challenge because she knew that there is nothing compared to her unbending strength, nothing.
In a split second she could wipe out the entire existence and then, yet again, she can create anew.
This is why we knew that being a woman was the most dangerous and most sacred honor as a human being today. Here I am, again, in the female expression, riding on an ancestral wound that is so deep and so hard that I am cracking all over the place and at this point there is no other way, there is no other place for me to go. Mother is asking “step into it, find your light, reclaim her (you) now” and by god I am scared shitless while horny as a dessert cat in heat. This movement has nothing to do with killing the patriarch. It has nothing to do with healing the feminine as we know her today either, because it’s all adulterated. The feminine doesn’t need healing. She needs reclaiming and revealing. She needs respect. What needs healing is the discords of our lives that resists and surpasses her wisdom and presence in our world. What needs healing is the mother wound. The disconnection from our deepest truth and love.
Lots of compassion from my heart to all (including myself) who has suffered tremendous loss and pain in their lives. A huge acknowledgement to the women who came before us and those who are stepping up in the future. We have done beautifully with what we knew and had. Now we are going to do magnificently in co-creating with mother a new dream for all of us to share.
...and I’m just sharing that I am being called by life to reclaim my sovereignty as a woman, by the shear contrasts that are in our world today.
I am being called to dance between order and chaos, to walk the fine line between sanity and insanity, to open up to ecstasy and agony, to exercise pride and humility.
I am being called to forgive those whom caused me pain because my looking at the divine feminine threatened their world.
I am being called to offer up my deepest gratitude for the ever unfolding magic of the unknown in my life.
I am being called to bow down to my own higher self and inner power and accept my sovereignty as my only place of home.
to reclaim my divine feminine and you have no fucking idea of what you are asking. because i can feel, i can feel in the time of the most chaotic movement inside of me, in the moments between the movement of sanity and insanity i can feel her, in the movement of falling from grace so hard and being so humiliated, being so devastated, being so wounded by peers by family, by loved once because i am looking into the eyes of the feminine, I am looking at her longer times than before and she is nothing like what you are telling me she is or suppose to be and you are telling me to reclaim her. oh, you have no fucking idea what you are asking of me! this is why women today are scared out of there fucking whits because who they have to reclaim is not welcomed here yet.
and i know this only by the breath, i know this only by the forbidden kiss that is on its way, i know it. it is coming, my premonition is being announced by the burning of my loins, by the beating of my heart, by the wave that keeps on moving inside my body up and down my spine, by the fevers raging through my bones, it is the prelude to the kiss,
am i ready? i don’t know. what the hell, how am i suppose to know? are we ready? we don’t know. we have no fucking idea. but we have to let go. if we don’t let go of the old it is going to be very messy because she will not have it anymore.
she is coming for us (back home. ) Mama is on her way!!!